Hold onto your hats (and maybe your dignity), because the 6th Annual Yangtze River Delta Hash is coming at you like a freight train of fun and absurdity. Get ready to mark your calendars for April 18-20, 2025, in the picturesque chaos that is Suzhou. It’s the weekend where your liver, legs, and sense of adventure will be thoroughly tested. Are you ready? Too bad, you’re coming anyway.
Friday: Sexy Red Dresses and Getting Lost in Old Town Suzhou
First things first, we’re kicking things off in style. On Friday, throw on your sexiest red dress—yes, you heard that right—and let’s paint the town red (literally, it’s your dress, but metaphorically, everything else). We’ll be getting lost in the magical maze of Old Town Suzhou, where you’ll probably find yourself wondering how you ended up on an accidental treasure hunt for the nearest bar. No judgment, just On-On!
Saturday: Ballbuster Challenge or Just… Wanking?
Now, if you’re a true adventurer (and by “adventurer,” we mean someone who doesn’t mind getting sweaty and questioning their life choices), Saturday is all about the Ballbuster. It’s a challenge that’ll test your grit, your stamina, and your ability to function after Friday night’s chaos. But if that sounds a little too “intense” for you (we get it, running isn’t for everyone), feel free to opt for the more leisurely activity of wanking—we mean, strolling! Take a casual walk, enjoy a cold one, and catch up with old friends while the rest of us make questionable decisions.
But wait! We’re not done! After the ballbuster (or your very leisurely stroll), strap on your dancing shoes, because it’s time to rock with the legendary Red Zeppelin. Get ready for a night of questionable dance moves, questionable singing, and even more questionable life choices. It’s going to be legendary, or at least, we’ll pretend it was.
Sunday: Rusty Man and the Hungover Run
If you’re still alive on Sunday morning (and honestly, we’ll be impressed if you are), kickstart your day with the Rusty Man. We’re not entirely sure what this involves, but it sounds like something that’ll either cure your hangover or give you a whole new reason to drink more.
And THEN, if you’re somehow still standing (which honestly, is a miracle), get ready for the Hungover Run. Because why not? Sweat out all the booze, regret, and questionable decisions from the night before. You’ll leave Suzhou with a smile on your face, a head full of memories, and a body that may never fully recover.
Don’t Miss the Fun – Contact Stinky Swallower!
You didn’t think we’d let you slip away without reminding you to contact Stinky Swallower (yes, that’s really their name) to secure your spot. Because, let’s be real, you’re not going to want to miss this madness. For more details, check out the poster or the YRD 25 Guide.
In Summary: Run the Trails, Toast the Tales, Roast the Hares
The 6th Annual Yangtze River Delta Hash is your one-way ticket to an unforgettable (and possibly regrettable) weekend of pure, unfiltered chaos. So, whether you’re running, drinking, dancing, or just trying to survive, we guarantee you’ll have stories to tell for years to come.
On-On!
